[Detroit!AU: dreaming]

[stilljustandrew]

In the dream he's sitting on the ground, in deep fragrant grass, leaning back against the hood of a car. There's another presence there, a shoulder a few inches from his, close and reassuring; there's a cold bottle of beer by his hand, resting in a slight depression in the earth.

And the night sky overhead is jeweled thickly with stars, more than he's ever seen before.

Comments

[gavemea_45]

He sighs again.

"Andrew... I don't think there's going to be another time."

Sam lowers his glance from the heavens, and meets his eyes.

"So... does it matter?"

[stilljustandrew]

"No, I mean --"

It's a dream. If it were real, he'd be looking away from Sam's face.

"Before. It would have mattered before."



"It doesn't now."

[gavemea_45]

He searches Andrew's expression for several seconds, and then nods.

"Okay."

Sam glances down at the ground, then back up again.

"There's so much to tell you, but I don't know how long we have-- anyway, listen. After-- once you're free again, make sure you get one of these."

He pulls aside his shirt, revealing a tattoo on the upper left side of his chest.

"Dean--"

Sam's voice cracks; he coughs, clearing his throat.


"--Dean'll know where."

[stilljustandrew]

He's seen that tattoo before, he thinks dimly. Maybe.

"Dean --" His own voice trembles. "I don't think he's gonna want to talk to me."

He forces himself to say it.

"I wouldn't if I were him."

[gavemea_45]

Sam looks down and away, fast, as if afraid of what Andrew might see in his face.






"Maybe not. Talk to him anyway. He--"

Long, long pause.

"--he's my brother, Andrew. Please."

[stilljustandrew]

(Outside of the dream, tears seep out from between Andrew's closed lids.)

"I was so awful to him." Small and choked. "When he told me. I, I didn't know -- I'm sorry --"

[gavemea_45]

"It's okay," Sam interrupts. "You--" He's still looking off to the side, into the night around them.

A pause.

"Whatever you said can't have been as bad as what I did to him, so."

His voice is carefully steady. Sam looks back at Andrew.

"He's gonna be mad, yeah. Probably for a while. A long while. Might get in your face about it, maybe be cold and hard, I don't know which. It all depends. But--"

He swallows.

"But ... "

Whatever he's trying to say, it looks as though he's not able to choke the words out.

[stilljustandrew]

Andrew reaches out and takes Sam's hand again, this time to offer comfort instead of ask for it.

He doesn't say anything; just waits to see if Sam's going to finish the sentence.

[gavemea_45]

Sam's fingers close tight around his, almost desperately so. He ducks his head, breathing rapidly.

"I, I can't," he manages, finally, and looks up. "But you can."

[stilljustandrew]

"I can what?" he whispers.

[gavemea_45]

"He doesn't stay mad forever," Sam tells him. A wry smile's there and gone in the same instant. "Usually."

"You can-- can work it out. Fix it."

He swallows again, and can't hold Andrew's eyes. Sam looks out at the trees.

"I just don't want him to be alone."

[stilljustandrew]

Andrew squeezes his hand.

(Because even though he's pretty sure that Dean would prefer being alone to his company, and that there's nothing to fix --)

"I'll do what I can."

[gavemea_45]

"Thanks."

He shifts, just enough to settle his back more comfortably against the car while leaving his arm around Andrew's shoulders, and looks up at the stars again.





"I always liked it here."

[stilljustandrew]

"Where are we?"

It hardly seems to matter. Safe. We're safe.

[gavemea_45]

"Indiana, maybe. I don't know exactly. Could be lots of places," Sam tells him.

"Off the road a long way from anywhere, outside at night under a clear sky -- that's where."

[stilljustandrew]

"Under the stars," he says softly.



"Sam?"

[gavemea_45]

"Yeah?"

His glance stays on the sky above. His head's tipped back far enough that his hair's fallen away from his face, leaving his profile starlit. Sam looks almost at peace.

"What is it?"

[stilljustandrew]

Almost at peace.

"I'm sorry I got so angry. When you left. I didn't know."

[gavemea_45]

Sam huffs out a breath that might even be a wisp of laughter.

"Don't worry about it." He glances sideways at Andrew. "Besides, I guess I didn't exactly do the best job of explaining, huh?"

[stilljustandrew]

"I should've known you went back to fight. Even if you didn't say."

He's looking back at the sky.

The memory of that terrible misunderstanding, and the awareness of its dire consequences ... somehow it doesn't seem to hurt as badly, under these stars. In this one place that Lucifer can't reach.

[gavemea_45]

He shrugs and turns his face upward again.

"Now you know."

Matter-of-fact.

[stilljustandrew]

"Yeah."

Quiet descends. Andrew reaches for the bottle of beer, and takes a swallow.

[gavemea_45]

Sam smiles a little wistfully at that, not looking away from the stars.

The fitful breeze flutters past again, rustling the leaves in the nearby trees. The chirping of crickets rises on the air from somewhere nearby.

"It was good to see you, man." Softly. "Take care of yourself, okay?"

[stilljustandrew]

Andrew looks at him swiftly, fear rising in his face. "Don't go."

[gavemea_45]

He glances sideways at Andrew, the small, wistful half-smile still touching one corner of his mouth, and shakes his head.

"I'm not going anywhere."